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How to get Dances?
If you go to a dance night, and rely purely on being asked for a dance, and don’t get as many dances as you would have liked or hoped. Or didn’t get a dance with anyone in particular you were hoping to dance with. Then the only person you have to blame is yourself. It’s mostly impossible for any individual to ask every single person on a crowded dance night for a dance.
The only way to guarantee yourself a dance is to ask!
But whether you are a newbie to dance nights or an experienced dancer. This whole ‘asking for a dance’ can be a nerve-wracking experience for many.
Well, nerve wrack no more!
I have some great tips garnered over my 15 years as Salsa Buena’s dance teacher and over 20 years as a dancer to help you confidently get ALL the dances you need!
1. Gents/Ladies etc – you CAN ask ANYONE for a DANCE.
Ladies in particular – this is considered the norm at dance nights. It’s a dedicated dance night for dancers. Anyone can ask anyone for a dance, regardless of your gender, or if you’re a lead or a follow, with both parties realising it has no other connation other than ‘I’d like a dance!’. (That doesn’t mean that connections aren’t made, sparks don’t fly and romance can’t blossom where both parties are single, looking and interested). Asking random people for a dance at a dedicated dance night, whatever your gender may be or whether you are a lead or a follow, IS the norm at these events.
2. Do the Classes Beforehand.
Taking part in the classes before the social dancing is a great way to settle in, get to know your fellow dancers at the event, and get your dance card marked! Don’t forget to say something like ‘Hope to catch you later for a dance!’ as you rotate around the class.
SPECIAL NOTE ABOUT CLASSES
If you have recently moved up a level from beginners, still settling in to your current level etc, please do not be alarmed if the Guest Teachers Improver/Intermediate+ class is a much higher level than you are used to. Guest teachers not being your regular teachers, have to look at the class as a whole and try to gauge the level. They do tend to teach a routine at the upper level especially if there are a lot of students in the class at the upper levels, or they may well bring it down a notch if they see most people struggling a bit. If you do find it too tough, there’s no shame in dropping out and joining in with the lower level class. For the reasons mentioned above it is no reflection on your current ability or level.
3. Get on the dance floor ASAP.
Get on the dance floor as soon as the social dancing starts. This earlier part of the night is sometimes a bit quieter and you can get more easily get those dances in with your class mates and other dancers before it gets packed out with more dancers arriving later on!
4. Set yourself a goal.
For example – ‘Tonight I won’t leave till I have asked at least 3 complete random people I do not know for a dance’. Now you have something to work towards. You’ll feel great and confident if you do it or at least tried. Next time promise yourself to reach that goal. Or if you did reach that goal then increase it by one or 2 for the next time. Keep doing that and eventually you’ll be able to ask all night long.
4. Make yourself look available.
Sitting at the back of the venue, drinking and chatting away with your mates/new friends etc is a great social aspect of the night. But doing that ALL night and then complaining you didn’t get any dances is a bit silly! Hang around near the dance floor, linger around the edges, stepping to the music solo, looking like you want to dance, is usually a sure fire way to get one.
5. Don’t take being turned down personally.
There is such a thing as dance etiquette (more on that in another article). It is considered bad manners to turn someone down for a dance without good reason. It’s absolutely considered very bad form to turn someone down because they are a beginner, ‘not good enough’ etc.
We all have to learn somewhere. Most of the best dancers realise that they wouldn’t be where they are without more advanced dancers accepting dances from all levels of dancer.
With that in mind, it is unlikely you will get turned down for a dance when you ask, and unlikely you will get turned down cos you’re not considered ‘good enough’.
It doesn’t mean you won’t ever get turned down. There are valid reasons for declining a dance. They may be exhausted etc.
IF it happens (and it happens to everyone no matter their level), don’t take it personally! Just move on, you WILL find a dance.
6. Feel free to tell the person your level.
Complete beginner/still learning? Either before or once you get accepted for the dance, do feel free to let the person know if you feel you are still very much in the learning process. No experienced dancer could reject the line, ‘I’m still learning and a dance with you will really help me’.
Then the experienced dancers, if they’re leading, will hopefully go gentle on you, and if they’re following they’ll be able to adjust for you.
Extra tip: If you’re still learning and leading – doing basic moves gently and really well is far better and more impressive to a follower than trying complicated moves you haven’t got the hang of yet with a stranger. Especially if it can potentially hurt them! Your new moves are better practiced with a willing partner first at class/after class to perfect it before using it with a random person on the dance floor.
7. B.O, Bad breath & Sweat!
As I mentioned above there are some valid reasons for turning down a dance! Whether it’s classes or dancing, we’re in close proximity to our partner. Bad breath, BO, sweat etc is VERY off putting. We all get a bit sweaty at dance nights, but no one wants to connect with someone that is soaked thru!
Take a shower, brush teeth, use mouthwash and deodorant before hand. Wear a clean fresh top.
Take mints, a change of top, deodorant and a towel with you if you need too. These are all par for the course and standard items in the dancers toolkit!
8. Dips
There’s a reason why dips and tricks are not generally taught in classes and that is due to the risk of injury! Leads, it is highly inadvisable to do a dip on a beginner, or to lead a dip if you are not experienced at dips. Followers if you do get dipped please remember you MUST support yourself in a dip, such that if the lead lets go of you, you would be totally supporting yourself and not fall over. Followers – Do not dip yourself!
9. Space
Please be aware of the space around you especially on a busy dance floor. Leads it is your responsibility to ensure your partner has enough space to do the move that you are leading. If you do go into another couples space dont forget to apologise. Dance etiquette!
10. And finally.
Just reach out your hand, smile, ask confidently and politely. Dance respectfully. You’ll get those dances!
Join us at our Classes & Events!
Now that you know how to dance the night away, it’s time to put it into practice!
The vibrant world of Salsa and Bachata Classes and Events in Cardiff and Cowbridge awaits you at Salsa Buena. Don’t delay – come join us and let’s embark on a journey of fitness, joy, and self-discovery through the enchanting world of Latin dance.
For details on our classes, events, prices, and locations, visit our website. We are eager to dance with you at Salsa Buena – your one-stop destination for Salsa and Bachata!
